I hate my job. I hate how all the women nag. I hate how the people in the restaurant are so picky and bitchy no matter what you do. I hate how nothing is ever good enough. I hate how my boss is passive aggressive. I hate how people are so sickly sweet to you that you know it's fake. I hate the way people come in 5 minutes before we close. I used to love it, but now, I dread every single day of going to work. Everyone just gets on my nerves now. Maybe I'm just in a bad mood every day that I'm there or I'm permanently bitchy no matter what.
I've applied for so many full time jobs, but I haven't heard anything back from them and I don't think I will. Life is so different than I thought it would be. I thought I would be in college by now, finishing my first year of UNT and having the time of my life. Instead, I'm a drop out who couldn't cut it at a big university. So now what do I do. I can't stay at a community college but I'm too afraid to go off and leave again. It also doesn't help that I feel like no one really believes in me. But I guess that would happen when I don't even believe in myself. I guess it's true what people say, you can't truly love anyone else until you love yourself. And I don't, I hate myself.
So now what. I need to know, and I need to know now, before I go crazy. Well, crazier.